The truth of the matter is that finding a boyfriend can be difficult. However, finding a gay boyfriend can be even more difficult.
That’s right, this article is for all those guys out there who have gone on dates with guys who say they are gay, but then realize six months into the relationship that they like pussy a little more than dick. It sucks, and no it doesn’t suck dick, if you get what I mean. This is especially the case in college. It’s like you have to turn over rocks to find a gay bf – mostly because a lot of them are not out of the closet, completely. Plus, if you keep telling yourself “I need a gay boyfriend,” it’s not going to happen, because you don’t want to be desperate.
See also: 5 Stages Of A Gay Relationship
Here is how to find a gay boyfriend, and not a boyfriend that pretends to be gay…
Don’t Act Too Desperate
When you are looking for a gay BF, you want to be sure not to sound too desperate. This is critically important, because desperation is not attractive. You don’t want to say, “I need a gay boyfriend” – you want to say, “I want a gay boyfriend.” This is especially the case if you are looking for a quality relationship that will last. This is also really important to do when you are on a date. A truly great guy will be able to smell desperation from a mile away.
Open Your Heart, But Not Too Wide
Just like you don’t want to be too desperate, you also don’t want to open up right away. Of course, you should be open and you should be honest, but you don’t want to seem too vulnerable. Vulnerability can seem like a weakness if you show it off right away. Of course, later on you can show your vulnerability, but you want to be careful in beginning – at least until you have established a relationship. After that, vulnerability can be really sexy.
Know What You Want
When it comes to getting a really great boyfriend, you need to know what you want. You don’t need a checklist or anything, but you should have a general idea. For instance, if you are looking for a stable guy, you want to find someone with a solid history and someone with ambition. You shouldn’t be having sex with the stoner; you should find the guy that chose his major the first week that he got to college. If you want a guy that likes to spend time and be close with his family, you should ask questions about his relationship with his family. The list really could go on, so you should be prepared to brainstorm and then check these things off your mental list.
Know What You Don’t Want
Just like it is important to know what you do want, you also want to know what you don’t want. If you don’t want a true commitment right away, you should be honest. The last thing you want is to dive headfirst when looking for a gay relationship and then realize that you feel sort of stuck inside of it. Also, if you don’t want a guy that smokes pot, or likes to go out all night, you want to be honest about that too. Not everyone is a homebody, so you may be doing some searching. But who ever said that finding a gay boyfriend is easy?
Let It Happen Naturally
Of course, if you want to truly find a gay boyfriend – someone that will be true to you – you want to let things take a natural course. This means that you may have to go on multiple dates. The truth of the matter is that if you want to find a gay boyfriend and not just a one night stand, you want to look for someone that can be a friend. During your dates, you really want to ask a lot of questions. By the time you have sex, you should feel like you know the person. If you are looking for a partner, you don’t want to wake up and feel gross after having sex – you want to feel like you learned something new. The key here is to not let lust get in the way, because lust is what will get you in the most trouble.
Go Where The Gays Are
Of course, you also have to go where the gays are if you want to find a true gay boyfriend. Usually, you can go to the lesbian and gay alliance group on your campus, or you can do it the old fashion way: find a gay bar or café near your campus. It is actually really easy to find a gay club, you just have to ask around, or look it up on the internet. Another way to find a gay boyfriend is to download an app. Right now, there are a lot of apps for guys looking to hook up and get serious. You just have to read through the profiles. If the profile says that the guy is looking for something casual or temporary, you want to move on. You certainly don’t want to be swayed just because the guy is hot.
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